Sometimes I See You

“Set against the backdrop of the social and economic turbulence of the 1970’s and ’80’s, Fels paints an unforgettable portrait of a young couple striving to create meaningful, adventurous lives for their quickly expanding family while coping with a daughter’s evolving and seemingly untreatable, mental illness. From her birth, her attempted suicide at age eight, a succession of mysterious illnesses, disappearances, estrangements, and, ultimately, her death at age twenty-four from astrocytoma, Fels offers an intimate and poignant examination of the life of a family: one that is at once unique and illustrative of American families in the final third of the twentieth century.”

Sample Text

“It remains a cruel and painful irony that Kirsten’s journey began and ended on Thanksgiving holidays, twenty-five years apart. During her brief sojourn, her life was a kaleidoscope of compassion, frenzy, love and pain. She was a tenacious fighter and a recurrent victim; a thoughtful, fun-loving daughter and sister, and a monstrous, hurtful hellion.

“During her life, Kirsten was diagnosed with a galaxy of maladies that more-than-often surpassed the competence of the medical community to heal. Over the years she was treated with little or no success for Clinical Depression, Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy, Bulimia Nervosa, Repetitive Self-Mutilation Syndrome, Borderline Personality Disorder, Multiple Personality Disorder, Brittle Bone Disease, Repressed Memory Syndrome and, finally – fatally – Astrocytoma.

“Her enigmatic roller-coaster life kept us all frightened, relieved, confused, joyful, angry, helpless and heartsick.

“This is the story of what happened to Kirsten, to Luisa, to our other children, Kaela, Sam, Eban, and Tom, and to me, between these two remarkable Thanksgivings.”

What Readers Say

“Thank you for writing this book . . . for your honesty and courage in telling this story so completely . . . with a clean, driving prose that is clear, informative, riveting, and stunning in its scope of information and emotion!”

SM Ashland, Oregon

“. . . I just finished ‘Sometimes I See You’ and loved it. What a funny and heartbreaking book! . . . I’m so glad you wrote such a beautiful book that many other people (myself included) will be able to identify with, enjoy, and draw strength from.”

G.A., Newburgh, New York

“. . . I have to tell you I read the memoir already, in just short of one day! (which I hardly ever do). As you undoubtedly know, it’s a very readable book and your (and Luisa’s) life has been fascinating (to say the least)! Once I got into it, I just had to read it to the end . . .)”

J.A. Berkeley

“What a candid description of incredible, continuous struggles and frustrations through which you and Luisa endured and persevered out of love for your child. For me the book was an expression of human nature with all its limitations – but at its best, with lessons for all of us. In short, a very good read on several levels.”

PJM Los Angeles

“I ended up reading the whole book after I got home and in the middle of the night. What a truly moving story. I had no idea . . . wow! Getting to walk through this part of your life is quite a journey. To see all you and Luisa did, experienced, decided upon, came upon, got jostled by is working me today. Stepping deeply into someone’s life is an honor. Your wordings, your humor, your insights . . . the challenges, the highs, the hilarities . . . all there.”

N.F. Northern California

“I just finished your book, and what a ride you take the reader on: part The Egg and I, part Innocents Abroad, and part The Search For Bridey Murphy. (Maybe I thought of that last book partly because the events in the book — at least those that were true — happened in my home town.)

And the whole story told in your unique and indomitable narrative voice.

As I neared the end I hoped you would end the book exactly as you did. That “Where Are They Now” epilogue was the perfect way to end.

Isn’t love strange?”

RM, Berkeley, California

” . . . I also laughed a lot while reading your book and you were really able to infuse a good dose of irony in the telling and that reminded me about a French author, Paul Claudel, who says that life is a balance of joy and sorrow. It was also very important to me to go through your daughter’s life. What a mysterious thing one’s . . . life can be . . . thank you for finding the energy to write that book.”

E.M., Milan, Italy

“I have a weird fascination with old yearbooks and estate sales. Maybe that’s what drew me to the fire-orange cover on the memoir Sometimes I See You. Chapters include ‘Birth,’ ‘Navajo Nation,’ ‘Judaism,’ ‘Austin,’ ‘UCLA’ and, most intriguingly, ‘Witness Protection, Satanic Cults and Shoe Glue.’ Despite the miniscule probability that self-published books will become bestsellers, it’s a way for people to tell their story. Sometimes, they’re written because belief in the book’s potential is so strong; sometimes, it’s a cathartic release of emotion. Sometimes I See You seems to lean toward the latter, but Fels’ life is interesting enough for a reader to keep the pages turning.”

N.G. (North Bay Bohemian)

“Sometimes I See You” is the story of a courageous, caring couple, and their children: a saga that spans multiple states, provinces, countries and decades. Leading surprisingly risk-taking lives, the author and his wife experience numerous adventures, some desired, and some quite the opposite. Some of their most unsettling encounters are with mental health professionals who provide generally unsuccessful or even detrimental treatment for their daughter. Throughout everything, their sense of humor and their continuing accomplishments survive.

Neal Snyder (California Child Protection Attorney, Retired)

“. . .I sat down with your book, intending to read a bit, and didn’t move until I finished the whole thing. Couldn’t stop. It is such a brave story … it is dazzling to me that your family endured all it did and has survived … no, thrived.”

Janent Wynans (Poet, Arizona)

“Just finished your book . . . couldn’t put it down!”

“It’s a remarkable book and beautifully written. Nothing held back. It’s a gift to those going through tough times.”

Dr. C.W. (Retired Psychiatrist, California)

“I have been devouring the book whenever I can steal a moment. You write from the heart . . . it is as if I am hearing you tell me the story orally. And what a story.”

D.W. (Attorney, California)

“Your book is really terrific. I started it yesterday and I couldn’t put down until I finished it late last night . . .”

Dr. C.H. (University of California San Francisco)

“Set against the backdrop of the social and economic turbulence of the 1970’s and ’80’s, Fels paints an unforgettable portrait of a young couple striving to create meaningful, adventurous lives for their quickly expanding family while coping with a daughter’s evolving and seemingly untreatable, mental illness. From her birth, her attempted suicide at age eight, a succession of mysterious illnesses, disappearances, estrangements, and, ultimately, her death at age twenty-four from astrocytoma, Fels offers an intimate and poignant examination of the life of a family: one that is at once unique and illustrative of American families in the final third of the twentieth century. Far from depressing, Fels blends the richness, humor, joy and sorrow of contemporary family life, ‘. . . the whole catastrophe!’ into this memoir.”

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